Family Guy 23×3

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<i>♪ Parece hoje que tudo o que você
vê é violência no cinema e sexo na TV ♪</i>

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<i>♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values ♪</i>

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<i>[Todos] ♪ em que costumávamos confiar?  ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Sorte, há um cara de família ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Lucky there's a man
who positively can do ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Todas as coisas que nos fazem ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Laugh and cry ♪</i>

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<i>[Todos] ♪ ele é um cara de família!  ♪</i>

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- sincronizado e corrigido por <font color =

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"#329c57"> nafrac </font> -
 -  -

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Good morning.  Eu vim para este andar porque a

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empresa descobriu um novo fluxo de receita:
 Giving tours of the brewery.

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E Peter, eu escolhi você para o trabalho.

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That's great!

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Let me just call my old
boss and tell him to shove it.

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[TELEFONE CELULAR TOCA]

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- Hello?
 - Mr. Lloyd?

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Este é Peter Griffin.  I quit.

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And I never sent in my pledge for

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your niece's Stand Up to Cancer 5K.

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Como está sua sobrinha, a
propósito, ela está indo bem?

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- Very sick.
 - Ah, fantástico.

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It was an honor just to help.

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Agora, aqui está tudo o
que você precisa para ser um

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guia turístico, um blazer que cinco pessoas se pendem,

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Khakis que parecem sujos, não importa
quantas vezes você as lava e uma

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banana marrom e molhada para o almoço.

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Awesome. I love telling
people where to go, like

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when I cased that McDonald's para o Hamburglar.

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There. At 11:45, they take the

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grease traps out the back door.

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Você entra e pega todos
os hambúrgueres que deseja.

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- Robble, robble.

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- Ei, cara, eu pensei que você
queria marcar alguns hambúrgueres.

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These kids don't have to die, man.

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Robble.  Robble.

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Ok, vá com calma. Be cool.
Eu não quero nenhum Robble.

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Hi, folks, I'm Peter Griffin, e
bem -vindo ao tour da cervejaria.

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All right, quick quiz.

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Quantos de vocês já ouviram
falar de cerveja antes?

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Wow, half.  Isso é muito bom.

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You can get a little
closer, gang, I don't bite.

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- ow!
 - Too close!

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E estamos orgulhosos de
dizer que o Pawtucket Ale é

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responsável por 99% de
todas as DUIs em Rhode Island.

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- Fascinating.
 - Você não deveria estar fazendo as notícias?

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Oh, no, we're doing a "O
melhor dos bloopers de notícias."

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Now, an update. Aparentemente,
o "Touth Sower" has just collapsed.

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Tou ... "Touth semewer?"  What?

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"Touth ..." Ok, vamos novamente.

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I'm Tom Tower... Holy crap.

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E agora, aproveite uma
experiência de realidade

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virtual sobre o nosso fundador, Pawtucket Pat,

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nesses fones de ouvido que
são definitivamente limpos.

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Hi, I'm Casey Affleck,
 AKA Pawtucket Pat.

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I signed this contract, then learned it filmed

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the same day as Ben
and J.Lo's wedding.

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Mais uma grande decisão
do caso. You'll cut that, right?

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Pawtucket Pat veio para America from

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England in 1771, looking for a better life.

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Os mares eram muito difíceis.

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<i>Pretty realistic, right?</i>

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[TUDO GRITANDO]

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When Pat finally reached the shore, the natives

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welcomed him with a flurry
of arrows to his colonial penis.

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[TUDO GRITANDO]

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Dear God, why's we experiencing this?

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Por favor, salve suas perguntas para o fim.

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In 1776, Pat refused to
sign the Declaration of

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Independence, saying
the only thing we need

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independence from is wives who won't let us drink.

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Ele deixou a Filadélfia,
proferindo vários

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insultos anti-italianos ao sair, todos verdadeiros.

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Unfortunately, he didn't
realize Philadelphia is built

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- em uma plataforma 9.000 pés no ar.
 - [HORSE NEIGHS]

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[TUDO GRITANDO]

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Just take off your headsets.

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<i>- [todos gritam]
 - [CASEY] The fall proved to be fatal.</i>

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<i>E logo antes do Pawtucket
Pat died, he pooped his pants.</i>

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Temos calças disponíveis
na loja de presentes.

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Okay, so now how many
of you know what beer is?

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Então nós aprendemos. Great.

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Okay, before we wrap it
up, any questions? Sim?

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Por que Jeff Bezos usa
aquele chapéu grande e

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estranho quando ele
monta sua nave espacial?

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[STUTTERS] I don't know, Joe.

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Bem, esse é o passeio,
folks. Please either tip

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me or shamefully avoid
eye contact on the way out.

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Covarde. Covarde. Covarde.

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Covarde. Friggin 'CheapSkate.

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Griffin, I'm glad I caught you.

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Há um VIP que quer um tour pela

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cervejaria, e é um pouco sensível.

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- It's Brett Kavanaugh.
 - Brett Ratner?

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- No. That's Brett Ratner.
 - Brett Favre?

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No. That's a different
scumbag Brett.

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Estou falando sobre o
Supreme Court Justice.

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Ele gostaria da turnê, e
I don't want a spectacle.

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Claro. Eu não tenho um
problema com ninguém

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Exceto marido de Jennifer Connelly.

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- [BRETT WHOOPS] I love beer!
 - é ele agora.

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Hello, your judgesty, Peter Griffin.

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Ei, apenas me chame de
Brett. All right, guys, skedaddle.

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Estou tão bombeado.

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